I haven't been looking for any jobs in
health and wellness anymore. I also don't want to stay where I am for
a few reasons. But I think my job could serve as a bridge to similar
but better work. I'm not sure how it will pan out, but I did get in
with a tutoring company that has independent contractor work. The
hourly rate is about 4 times as much as I make now, but the question
is how steady would it be? With that in consideration, I am looking
into proofreading companies that also offer independent contractor
work so I could have two sources of income in case one doesn't
provide enough. I thought for a while that being an employee with a
company would be better – safer. When I was in high school, and
even college the first time, if you'd asked me if I wanted something
“safe” I would've said no. I didn't want boring. I wanted
adventure. Then, after my twenties were over and I still wasn't
getting anywhere, I thought maybe safe wouldn't be bad as long as I
was doing something I enjoyed during my 8 hour day. That's where I've
thought the root of the problem has often been. The idea of having to
succumb to this predetermined schedule, to live life with such a
strict structure and rules. I thought health and fitness would be the
answer. But maybe I didn't need health and fitness after all. Maybe
what I needed was just freedom and adventure as I originally thought.
It's kind of like I'm coming full circle and returning to interests I
had from forever ago. Writing, the arts. Okay, maybe just the writing
part. But doing it in a way that fits me. I did like that my current
job let me pretty much make my own hours, but it's still restrictive
in the sense that I have to do the 8 hours all in a row, have to
commute and deal with traffic, have to deal with all the distractions
that come with office work – phones ringing, people talking, potato
chip bags crinkling, keyboards banging, janitors vacuuming...everyday
is super stressful and I always feel on the verge of a nervous
breakdown. If I could work at home in peace and quiet, it would be
heaven. Being with students one-on-one in person would also be fun
because of the interaction. If I try this out and it works, maybe
I'll be set? A good income, freedom and control, work that caters to
my strengths and interests. Yes, there was a lot of zig zagging
around that I did before this, but does it matter? I know from the
outside it might not seem like everything has a connection to the
destination, but I still believe everything happens for a reason /
has significance.
